Geoff?

Yes.

Maybe they’re hotdogs with a strong sense of justice.

I’ll boop you on the snoot.

…and now we wait.

Frozen, or in-the-rumps?

Hehe

After years of learning Spanish my brother pointed out that the word for umbrella, paraguas, is simply “for water”. Similar to how parasol is “for sun”.

So obvious, but somehow my brain missed it.

There is a shoe store where I used to live named Red’s Shoe Barn. I was always hoping the correct lights would fail to make their sign read “ed’s hoe Bar”. To my knowledge it never happened, but I don’t know.

Go on.

What if being shamed is my kink?

For me an email is when I don’t need a quick response. A text is when I want a faster response but I don’t want to interrupt what the other person is doing. A call is when I want a quick response and I think it’s worth interrupting the person.

I very rarely call.

Right, I agree with you there. I guess I should invert my question. If you’re tipping the driver, what is the delivery fee for?

These two costs seem redundant.

If you are paying separately for the delivery, what is the tip for?

If you are used to driving a manual, you don’t rest your foot on the foot rest area, you keep it just about to push the clutch. Also, saying the brake pedal is the full width of two pedals is wrong, but it is certainly wider. I have gone for the clutch in an automatic once and just barely caught the edge of the brake pedal. The results were very confusing, and without exaggerating it took me 5-10 seconds to figure out what I had done. It was while driving my mom’s car with her in it and she looked at me with the most “what the fuck are you doing?” look she has ever made.

This was all over twenty years ago but yes, it is definitely possible.

Technically a gay couple is twice as manly as a hetero couple.

Not really related to the story, I just like that fact.

That was my thought. Am I not a person?

I’m often for giving people the benefit of the doubt, but the “keep your dumb mouth shut” part makes me feel like this is less of a shower thought and more of a “I didn’t know where to complain” thought.

I’m guessing you didn’t really think this one through. Perhaps try on Unpopular Opinions ?

Maybe it’ll be the next MySpace?

Maybe they just typed it out how they would say it?