Which one is Mary, and which Jesus?

Xlon’s Twitter

So does that mean they no longer have nuclear capabilities?

Somebody’s family is having a rough week

Hay is for hoses, straw is for turtles

Finally.

An appropriate opportunity for a headline writer to use the word ‘slammed’ and they went with ‘hit?’

JFC

Lemmyors

Ok, but why do I smell hippos??

They will now be known as Doctors With One Border

Eh, they had a good run 🤷‍♂️

You know shit is serious when world leaders start slamming things

Nobody had a faster robot?

This vampire joke doesn’t suck as much as usual

Same, tbh

Stilgar: Again?

I blame the shuttlecock. It’s always the shuttlecock.

3 days to Paris, one week at most…

US with new technology:

To help fight human trafficking? No

To help find abducted children? No

To catch “illegal” brown kids trying to go to school? Hell yeah!

It’s buttholes all the way down